April 14, 2013

• nsfw/nsfl parodies again.

  I write  different sometimes funny lyric to songs.  sometimes both the song and the new effort sucks….or just my efforts     I don’t care.  if I could help myself, oops, no such luck.  What follows is probably not safe for work environments and contains language and inappropriate situations/attitudes.  I’d mention who these were meant for…but perhaps they might wish plausable denyability.

  Spirit in the Sky by Norman Greenbaum
  Pizza Place, Pie-Eyed

  I can’t lie, and i risk my figure a mess
  because I’m chasin’ a slice of the best
  each bite, a heaven, I attest
  at my pizza place, Pie-eyed
  at my pizza place, Pie-eyed.
  here’s proof it needn’t be fried
  to bulk up my thighs, but’s tastes as if it’s blessed
  here comes bucket iced mini wines at my request

  compare yourself over the years we all rust
  this crap place beau jo’s has honey for the crust
  that dress wont fit dont even try
  time and choices ‘ll offend you
  but you like pizza and let’s get pie-eyed
  time and choices ‘ll offend you
  salvation pie and pie-eyed
  Quick! to heavenly slices and mud your eye!
  when you know those clothes ‘ll only make you cry
  time for double cheese ‘shrooms and garlic with white wine

  never am a wino yet I’ve wined
  flip ‘em the bird say “read this”
  lets hit them up for a pizza pie
  jalapeño pineapple even is nice
  to the pizza place for that and pie eye!
  steamin’ crusty crust and here’s mud in your eye!
  youth’s figure went to the sweet bye and bye
  celebrate with me the joy not sex but great pie
  to the pizza place! let’s get pie-eyed.

  -
  

  chevy van, sammy johns
  

  Statutorily banned

  On my bicycle with spokes-click tin can
  I hollered out hey diddle diddle, come get fo’ shizzle.
  where’s the free candy, little manling?
  in my pocket, next to the rocket, let’s blow.

  cause with the lettuce and some devils cabbage here
  cops lights bustin’ my derrière
  caught  me payin for too little hair
   cuff,click wrist, each of my hands
  another fucked up night for me.

  slipped and fell for a face like a bagel
  a long time in the lock-down
  can live near no school and good work none.
  judge said my best ho call is make no sound

  cause with the lettuce and some devils cabbage here
  cops lights bustin’ my derrière
  caught  me payin for too little hair
  all cuz, hey? who checks i.d’s
  another fucked up month for me.

  what makes me laugh  real huge
  is now the hood rat’s on the womans end
  3 in foster care tweeked out unfit for a shallow grave
  8 more and I’m free again.

  cause with the lettuce and some devils cabbage here
  cops lights bustin’ my derrière
  caught  me payin for too little hair
  hustled by a hoodrat daughter of the mayor
  for a couple of fucked up decades for me.

  bye bye to the lettuce and so long devils cabbage
  prison stretched my derrière
  wasn’t even playin with miss too little hair
   how many more valentines to my hand
  one fucked up life, they screwed me.

  -
  

  IT’S MY PARTY
  Lesley Gore
  It’s My Housing

  Nobody cops to where my moonshine has gone
  an all my merchandise
  Welcome to namby-pamby land
  free of fun and vice

  It’s My Housing, and i’ll shit my pants if I want to
  shit my pants if I want to, crap nuggets in my shoe
  Serve me quick or I’ll put this cane to you.

  You call this food, I’ve tasted better shoes
  it’s gross nasty and vile
  Miss Emma and a gallon midnight clear
  where’s that phone so I can dial

  It’s My Housing, and i’ll shit my pants if I want to
  SPILL my peas if I want to, howl cuz i’ve a mind to
  Serve me quick or I’ll put this cane to you.

  —— LEAD BREAK ——

  Dying isn’t always instant, pardon me if I get bored
  but, thank you, it’ll be on my time
  stay the fuck away from me with machines
  that kinda of survivin is a crime.

  It’s My Housing, and i’ll shit my pants if I want to
  shit my pants if I want to, fling my peas near you.
  Serve me quick or I’ll put this cane to you.

  • 3:31 am
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