If *I* were to say i am sorry

people tend to agree, totally.

therefor I find it unfair I’m denied humility

except face-down in a forever pile of shit.

And, don’t think I haven’t had that experience either.

I have had it and it smells bad – I missed out on the taste.

 …

any moment

of greatness

is suspect &

inspected for

that taint of

woop for you

hurry up and

outdo me and

fast! or he’ll

get dillusions

he might have

a fucking prayer

so, if i say I’m

…

ever so sorry, I think that didn’t go well

it may have been in bad taste, or some 

other sin of choice, just remember that should,

I admit that, I’m fucked forever without redemption

which for others is a whoops sa sorry but for me is the 

the complete and total ruination of all hope and life kill me now

Because that is what all of my life experiences lead me to conclude

if i say i am sorry i am indeed completely without hope of redemption

-

if i say i’m great

i may be, shh, not so loud

me step to the plate?

just prove it, who would believe?

facts are meant to be denied.

Better-than-average, or BTA, is a dangerous acronym when applied to food/consumables.  BTA is close to two preservatives, BHA and BHT, for a start, and I just told you they were preservatives, therefore I almost need say no more as I didn’t say salt, so I said “poison.”  Another reason is slightly more complicated so I’ll quote

by  Charles Osgood  (1933-)

“…If you want to be great,
Pretty good is, in fact, pretty bad.”

There is a graduation-type ‘dripper’ of a poem where good enough is neither but I can’t find it.  Thus what follows is said baldly without any allusions to greatness…which is dangerous…because better than average says nothing of greatness… but sometimes it is all the greatness there is and thus one can be content – to suck a little less than another.

-

Margarita night!

Jose plus Grand Mariner in

starts blue; ends up green.

ageless! love-affair

sparks fly, but not commitment

a taste, but no glass

t’was tiger-y sauce

chicken painted so saucy

close means left-overs.

-

As Carly Simon sung about repetitions in life, it shouldn’t surprise anyone who has read me that yesterday got slept a lot of it through because someone can not have blue became green margaritas as they hit me like bricks and I slept the ONE off for an 18 hour nap.  I learned this in 2010 after getting a better kit up of mr and mrs t’s green m. mix, jose black, gran gala…and 12 hours later a reminder i process but not so fast – here you go MOM *what mom doesn’t enjoy a disgustingly GREAT (if boozy brown….golden…) margarita, if she still wants one now and again?  the only thing i can say in my defense was i didn’t buy but half as much and shared…albeit not enough.

I can’t say it was a wasted evening even if it was a short one for me, i can’t say I wasn’t thrilled i came up with a sauced chicken wing to do…which is a fine party food.  I can say though that better than average is dangerous in that if it ain’t great …and no sign of success past nibbles… polite nibbles… or polite failure says it was great..it can easily just be way to go said with some reason for derision.

not my margarita but note it looks like a sno-cone rip off of a drink rather than a drink

again not MY chicken wing but a representation of how it might thrill you less somehow than full delight.

and what I probably should have wasted my time doing…reading a romance novel instead of throwing a party that was better than average sure which meant it can have been great but i’ve a sneaking suspicion it was just another day.

this morning has me after the disposal of the stuff that didn’t make it this week…as in it did too well but only in the fridge so out it goes in favor of the mmmm

folgiers happens so does dog poop on the shoes.  but it isn’t so bad

imagin mocha swirl normal people strong with frothy chocolate milk.  all the dishes done and a gallon of iced tea  i made that black with jasmine tea.  it turned out to be green afterall or oolong but not black… so in with a splash of the orange extract brown sugar black tea and a lotta shaking of the fee brothers cocktail bitters … here you go… a spiced iced.

aha!  i walked by the television for the week later ollllld news that thirstey alley was displeased …cuss cuss… that abercrombie and fitch, a fashion retailer… England but i’m not sure… is against carrying plus sized ladies clothes.    while some purchase upon the new argument that we all have merit regardless of our weight may be shown to be true… I’m curious and thus answer me this, doesn’t this amount to strengthening the divide between what fashion ultimately is…elitist – I’m different, thus fashionable?  

we seem to live in a time where the situation isn’t a choice but a fight for who has the moral highground thus choose this way or that but i’m right…and thus have stolen any meaning from the situation.    we also live in a time were only this or that one is allowed an oppinion and thus all opinions have the right amount of weight.  this really seems amusing because we don’t want our chocies invalidated and thus our voice silenced and we all seem to swiftly damn preachers for preaching to us our new oppinion no thank you church who advances not my politics!  yet here we are to shun abercrombie and fitch for saying fat women aren’t in the fashion club.  abercrombie and fitch didn’t invent fashion but it would seem it adheres to the mantra they target their consumer model and pursue it. funny that’s the business side of fashion to choose their market directions… sour grapes on fat ass kirsty ally for what? getting your clothesline turned down now trying to make a company look bad for being not anti fat person but anti kirsti alli.. ..lord go ahead heap the old fashions on a pyre and wait 3 years for fashions to…what become rare and more desired.  why do i get the feeling this is an abercrombie and fitch sneaky marketing ploy???

i made it to my play dough date at the old folks home  I literally tried my playdough heart out to make my home of clay and other things as in just with my hands not tools- I ran out of time to hunt them down or print up my schpeal about what atreus ‘s  treasury is.  I officially have been 15 years out of the game of helping people transfer chairs and I got an ow but thankfully got help prior to that being a disaster… that’s no longer a skill for the time being  Idid have some other nice things happen during this outting which are: I picked up a book ‘the world of pies” karen stolz and while I didn’t have ages of time to read it I was pleased to see two things about it.. the writer mentioned iowa workshop for writers and there was a clear technicality to uplift the story  so far roxanne in 63 is a tomboy and mom is catching the business about standing up for making a colored lady gain credit for HER work not be sponged off as the employers; I puroosed another book oregon weddings wherein I was displeased to catch a preachy theme including scriptures… BUT I did note as the title implies it is set in oregon state usa and thus there is things about the location that wikipedia is never likely to divulge… like how the oregonians in this author’s experience WIITH team, noted a true love of their lighthouses and a dislike of getting the facts wrong; I suck at kindergarten play dough hour; Ipicked a random dandelion along the way to lunch and noted no fishy smell thus my suspicion was correct, I picked mine just as they fertilized…which means i’ve to toss them and more than likely i wont ge in on this season’s dandelion win anytime this month… I don’t have anymore scouted safe enough locations.  

I have a few more moments video game for the working devils underlyings as time goes by for the “seriour writing prompt”  also some jap food serious party highlife shite.  I’m thinking the meat and potatoes tastes sausage stuffed lotus root.

I’mthinking joshua kaddison did up some fine piano in the 90′s as she was beautiful in my eyes.  but do not forget people like david lanz and paul speer we hot shit in the pacific northwest with narada music.  funny my kind of music. david arkenstone did up him and his penny whistle with synthesizers in the album another star in the sky, yanni was waning like the moon and imagination lost it’s keys to imagination with the dawn of another time coming and the shipss still came and left… mostly left the stern view of what is.

-

I made toastadas with the aid of latest silver haired roommate.  he is the concert master!

-

entirely unrelated to this someone was playing old skool rap and it occured to me

when zaputer met the computer

conspiracy has a hysterectomy

no grassy knoll shooter

just a patsy fall guy to tragedy.

you get points if you remember what this alludes to, you get far more points if you say almost sincerly that i should grok my inner rap god saying fuck you to idioto conspiracy nutjobs.  or you can go hunh as per usual.

I put forth my offerings, they were commented upon nicely.

stopligh marinated chicken casserole. the chicken didn’t excite me and as this is the third time it’s made it’s good enough to try fourth sure but it’s a very brand specific dish!  the peychoud bitters versus fee brothers… no beuno the apple cider versus sherry or white distilled disn’t work. the brightness is missing from the raspberry preserves versus @saintvi‘s damn fine jam. it beat smuckers even!  thus it’s a tricky dish. for tastes smuckers way second place o organic brand raspberry preserves way hug distant third yet another reason no offense organic is overpriced crap.

I brought over spritzers and i had to do up so drive by bartending dang~  no one wanted the spritzers.  damned sinners.  i got some hawaii’s own passion punch mixed with red cab and berry seltzer.  mmm. 

=

i liked the spritzers.

I really liked the pear pie. mmm. spiced crumb mmmm

I’m not sure I’ve had a more consistant gravy in a spell which was for the garlic mashed, and pork medalians..or sauteed zuch and yeller neckers.  bread rounds out the meal btw a fine nosh really i put for spritzers and casserole i liked my spritzers and nay really on the casserole – i also made some rough garan nasala chicken drumsticks that wer snack actions. they were there but not featured.

I hope you all had a fine night with your gatherings or avoidances.  we watched the michael orr storry. for the evening disney type feel good flick I mean awwwwww.

I’ve about 2 lbs of chicken tit b/s.  I’ve a lil box of snack tomatoes, I ‘ve little tub of mushrooms creamini’s, I’ve a few zucchinies and a couple of yellow neckers, I have a jicama hee cumma I have garam masala as the cheap thimble tubs didn’t have but tumeric and the other just that section was out of curry and I just didn’t feel like paying 7.89 for a big tub of curry for half a thimble ful I’ll  heh not suffer with the pepper black and coriander with brain fart yeah  what’s it called the   arabic coffee search… yep cardamom – that’s unctious enough.  

I also got a small tub of sourcream… sorry @moniet I didn’t get the chipped beef dried whatever it is but you can bet I thought of you.  I also got 3 for 5 hawaii’s own frozen 48 oz made but conentrates of passion punch/ pineapple starfruit andguava strawberry to think of my favorite aussie @chrissy_licious.  these juices one or all wiblend with the also gotten berry seltzer 12 pack cans for the lexia alice whitenew zealand  (moscato white/ sweet) and the little penguin cabernet of australia wine lands (sweeter bright red no spices) ((my favorite aussie is kiwi born))  I also got the flower a salad dressing sized vase forthe roases and baby’s breath mix ten spot not the last turkey in the shop look but pretty and propably close .  I got hot sauce and honey the topatio which is normal people hot sauce and storebrand clover honey.

I popped by the liquor barn….anyone remember the full moon fever album on cd where your bonus tracks were tom petty and gang making animal noises?  i got the white wine there along with a 4 spot of benediktiner weiss beers and a fee brothers bitters bottle which is for the

raspberry wasabi chicken and zucchini… if i get any luck I’ll be making chicken kebabs bother yogurt chicken and razzies.  the main dish is chef recovered the bastard so I’m ancillary  antsy larry with weirdness he’s making pork medallion.    you cant say my offering wont pep it up some and I’m bringing on the wine as my mommy loves spritzers and I’m on that case  and before your sour grapes comments.. please remember cheff didn’t stretch before golf hurt hisself is indeed a fine cook.  I can cook exciting and then try to compete against him and lose.  why lose share  so I get kebabs! and sprtzers and bought my mommy flowers. I’m not really losing shite and for the record I like my offerings and I drool too over the idea pork medalions… that sounds yummy and he like I cooks good.

oh and i know this is a horrible stereotype… but gals like chicken.  I’ll probably win

the cursory searches of oh I just saw that say the wasabi and the vinegar ain’t about nor is the ckewers .. none is a tragegdedy just an annoyance  getting the oh i sjust saws it.

I’ve a mom, contrary to some biologic jokes that could be leveled.  I am her second of three. she’s kept all alive 35 plus years on average.  way to go MOM.

mom’s day is coming.  I cook.  the sis’ male friend also trained chef has a blackened underarm from golf gone wrong.  Mom hates pretty much any non american spice she herself isn’t cooking with and the dishes all have to be done kitchen wipped down prior to serving anything past wine.  I have a modest budget.  typical enough restrictions.  what on eatth shall i co9ok?

@blizzzx has me drooling over his bbq today and I implore him to let me swipe his publicized recipes… let’s see if’n he’ll laugh up a post.  my memory says to expect a homemade bbq sauce well semi… but you see he never named names so i haven’t the shopping list.  what’s his secret????  @kellsbella sent me notice I’m her lil kumquat but i haven’t club noveau’d I haven’t been hammin. so I have to get rid of those before stale and two lemons and an orange.

oh horror’s what shallllll I do??

I’m thinking the following.  I have cabernet/sauvignon for adult beverage land -enough rhine whinnnnne in case I need to make blends a momma to impress or at least get smiled at for the effort…this is the lady that knows your poopface so she knows before you let fly with the syllable of exclamation you have s bombed twiced.

so indian yogurt chicken or aka chicken tikka masalla or in my case vindaloo or aka “butter chicken” is out.  you don’t do indian food.

Icould make a lemon pepper light chicken swarma thing and pretend I’ve channeled my Detroit heritage go greektown to some effect but Greek isn’t American so nay!

no offense, budget’s limited and mom’s also not a big seafood fan… i could duplcate the richie rich fireplace trout wine poached with herbs o9ver a fireplace…I even have the aid of a picky chef with one arm who0 can still probably outcook me… but while the above’s possible not ho0lding it for 6 for 2 hours I don’t own the equipment and frankly haven’t practiced how. and besides I don’t own a fireplace…only a wood stove start groaning…that is me admitting wussiness

i’ve no faith my grill’ll work not on my budget.

what will i doooo???

bake chicken

i can make some yogurt chicken as i like it.  I can make some shake aned bake offering, I canfoil it up thereal sauce kind bbq wimp style chicken, i can make tea smoked chicken alfredo what i’m like to do is?

that aint it.

see if your taste bud’s agree chicken  kebabs of chunk white chicken tiger sauce and vegetables with a salad similar in presentation to this.

v

remember one caviot. I have to cook this left handed only our prize chef is not yet healed and i am that schnarky enough to compete a tiny bit of course i win as i’m blind without a car as well.  wish me luck and or more wine just in case!/s

xanga balked at me posting this for a bit so.. here’s it now with even more.  this is seriousness….as in a draft

Zeb’s 5.9 AMC envelop to boblo coaster, then minor position edit….now notepad home

Dreams Royal Blue…. or at least the beginning.

“Zoo soot Wyatt,” Lil’ Pita warbles,
“toe black a hot ‘ole beer,” WHAT? WHERE?
Swing’s Back, Baby, and that’s fact
So sings Frita from her car chair

Frita, Five, collects nicknames like black finds lint
Pita Pocket, FREE ME (preemie) Piece of piece of *Pizza! Pizza!
Nineteen Hundred Ninety-Seven; Kindergarten
Momma bites her lip; it’s time to swing East.

“Pita Pita,” Momma looks into the rearview
“It’s FREE TA! Mommy!” says a big pout
(The R’s come softly it’s more like “Flea Pa!”)
“How…was school, Frita?” Momma switches subjects

“be seen ocean oil blue” Momma ‘s only get so much
“You saw the ocean Royal Blue?” guesses Momma
“Yessss and burdee poo-pooed on Howie” giggles Girly
Crap. The kid’s having fun and we gotta go.

The light turns red. The way north means turn Left; South
There’s hours before the other two are due
Left it is corkscrewing towards the way Washington
Up giddy-up to touch the white sky

http://www.timelessimagesmi.com/boblo.html

-

google maps

http://www.portlandbridges.com/photoimagefiles/astoriabridge-35mm0film00029-s.jpg
Shoot, should have adjusted color to royal blue not azure :X anyway…moving along.

-

“Mommy, when’s Daddy coming home?”
This is some coaster! pitted stomac before the top!
“Daddy’s On Set; He’ll be home soon, Sweety.”
The hell he will, the hearing’s not ’til Monday.

Down Momma and Frita go as a ship slips out to sea
At bridge’s end it Chips, water, gas and time to pee
And that picture perfect smile; the last for awhile
Lazy ocean bird serenades and that awful feeling, Free.

A different girly giggle is in the breeze
Daddy had a different movie in mind
some assistant flubbed the lines and got slapped
and a weekend at the city’s pleasure to be at ease

colors invert so do shades
roads like swords go both ways
along the brick road yellow in hue
folded ankle turning dreams royal blue.
-
II.

Here it is butt crack of dawn
it oscilates damn her and uh oh
untrust worthy? HAHA MON DAY.
the parents sung that – I, Howard?

I, Howard… i, ho ward…. howard.
Damn Cock-tease. and now what
this better blow over…it wont
FUCK. I just now the “sorry” comin’

…

Case dismissed. what about my weekend?
Case dismissed. What about my JOB?
case dismissed. She’s not gonna buy it
Case dismissed. yep. knew it. Cashiered.

Indians had totem poles, power.
I get statues and plague…PLACKS
Tourist trap ripoff symbolism
beurocratic bird shit bill, (Ticket.)

case dismissed means she LIED
don’t believe you, don’t bother
case dismissed means what gives?
who you foolin? I gotta go.
…

Cryin’ Monday to fab Thursday!
the joint pays per job wait 3 days
cash money. cute counter chick
hey Shai-sparkles! I had her.

Yo English garden creatures, Neil DIAMOND
right NOW, easy, ditch the bitch
Case Dismissed and I lost?
good riddance; please fuck right off

III.

ACKKKKKKK! a BIRD thunk. windsheild.
screech go tires. honk go horns.
Mommy!you killed the the BIRDY
It’s okay sweety, It’s okay sweety.

cheatin’ stoned drunk broke husband
Every call creditors bills PAY NOW
house wont sell, I need; dying children…. DAMN BIRD
Thanks GIVING gobble gobble and GET Mer-ry

t’was just a dream, t’was just a dream
RINGGGGGGGG.Honey, your dad’s going….
rinnnng let discuss their offer…CLACK!!!
to hell with. this. place.
…

it’s a tragic lie, flickers… good wine.
four days and… please DONT SNOW!
that kid STARES….? peace and QUIET
they’ve ALL a wake up comin’

…

limpin in that, god damned wind
what are we go ing to do
he drove away. that asshole
It’s NOT MY FAULT WHAT? A bill?

ACT of GOD, that’s BULL SHIT
he drove away – I lost everything?
well a few pictures, check’s in the mail.
eighty-four hundred DAMN Dollars.

THank you Seagull Iowa
act of god my black ass.
check say PAID… I didn’t? SIGN???
bye bye everything bye

Welcome to Detroit Michigan
Popcorn gunfire, not corn
Bullshit Bills, more snow coming
all three have the damn pinkeye.

Therrrrrre’s no place like home
Therrrrrre’s no place like home
Therrrrrre’s no place like home
at least the pumps are red.